My husband and I love to visit areas where ships clutter coastlines and the waters disappear into the horizon. I am drawn to water, no matter the depth or type of coastline it is. I love rivers, oceans, lakes, ponds, and creeks. I’m the type of person that can’t just look at a body of water and enjoy the scenery. I have to dip at least a toe or finger in it, even if it’s freezing cold. But, if it’s warm or the chill isn’t unbearable, I have plunge into the water, even if I’m not properly clothed for it. I’ve always been this way, my parents can attest to it from stories of me as a toddler, escaping their attention and jumping into a pool of water, clothes and all. With that said, my husband loves ships, boats, and lighthouses. He prefers to float on the water in a vessel or at least admire it from the shore.
I wonder if I’m just anxious for a vacation or if God’s trying to show me something today. I think it’s a little of both. This morning, I was praying and not really going anywhere with it. I have so much on my mind right now and a lot of emotions and thoughts swirling around my head, so this blog post could cause a little seasickness to the reader. Disclaimers are necessary in the world today! Anyway, I was loading laundry into the washer, when I just felt like God spoke one word to me, that word was harbor. I felt like he wanted me to explore that word, so I did. It lead me to first look up the definition of the word, although I know the definition, but investigating it and chewing on it often leads to other thoughts. There is a noun definition and a verb definition. The noun definition is a place on the coast where vessels may find shelter, especially one protected from rough water by piers, jetties, and other artificial structures. It is also a place to seek refuge. So, thinking of harbors, I immediately think of mine and my husband’s love for them. But, being a believer, I also think of God and Him being the place that I find shelter during the storms. He is my refuge in all the emotional thoughts and feelings that I am having at this moment. I think of sailors who are at sea and a storm comes upon them, they have to act quickly, but their thoughts are immediately on seeking out the horizon, trying to locate a place to dock their vessel, searching for safety. The depths of the seas surround them; waves crash over the boats, the storms probably feel like they aren’t ever going to end. I wonder how hopeless they feel when they see the strength of the ocean and understand they aren’t in control. Then, how do they feel when they spot land, a lighthouse, a harbor with hope inviting them in? I’m sure they feel relieved, glad, and thankful. I think of myself and certain times in my life when I’m trying to ride the storms out without seeking direction or looking for refuge. When I do that, I may feel in control for a little while, but then the severity of the storm hits me and I get scared and realize that I need a refuge, a savior, a 
harbor on the horizon. With all that being said, I feel like God is just saying that I need to dock my vessel. I need to tie up to His dock, rest, refuel, and await instructions for the next step.
However, there is also a verb definition for the word, harbor, in two forms as well. The first is to keep (a thought or feeling, typically a negative one) in one’s mind, especially secretly or to have in mind a thought or feeling, usually over a long period of time. With this definition, I start thinking, what am I harboring in my mind? What bad thoughts are keeping me weighed down? Is this why I feel like I’m drowning sometimes? Is it worry, anger, doubt, self-pity, aggravation, or maybe a molotav cocktail of them all? Whatever it is, I know it’s not healthy for my soul. The other verb definition is to protect someone by providing a place to hide. This points to God again; he protects me and gives me a place to hide. The scripture that I immediately think of when I think of this definition is Psalm 91:4 “He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.” In this, I know I have to give all my thoughts, feelings, and hurts that I’m harboring to God. He will cover them and I’ll find refuge there.
The next passage that I was led to was Psalm 107. I love this and have highlighted the theme of this blog today, but the whole passage is spiritually filling, I hope that it feeds you as well.
1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good!
His faithful love endures forever.
2 Has the Lord redeemed you? Then speak out!
Tell others he has redeemed you from your enemies.
3 For he has gathered the exiles from many lands,
from east and west,
from north and south.[a]
4 Some wandered in the wilderness,
lost and homeless.
5 Hungry and thirsty,
they nearly died.
6 “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he rescued them from their distress.
7 He led them straight to safety,
to a city where they could live.
8 Let them praise the Lord for his great love
and for the wonderful things he has done for them.
9 For he satisfies the thirsty
and fills the hungry with good things.
10 Some sat in darkness and deepest gloom,
imprisoned in iron chains of misery.
11 They rebelled against the words of God,
scorning the counsel of the Most High.
12 That is why he broke them with hard labor;
they fell, and no one was there to help them.
13 “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
14 He led them from the darkness and deepest gloom;
he snapped their chains.
15 Let them praise the Lord for his great love
and for the wonderful things he has done for them.
16 For he broke down their prison gates of bronze;
he cut apart their bars of iron.
17 Some were fools; they rebelled
and suffered for their sins.
18 They couldn’t stand the thought of food,
and they were knocking on death’s door.
19 “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
20 He sent out his word and healed them,
snatching them from the door of death.
21 Let them praise the Lord for his great love
and for the wonderful things he has done for them.
22 Let them offer sacrifices of thanksgiving
and sing joyfully about his glorious acts.
23 Some went off to sea in ships,
plying the trade routes of the world.
24 They, too, observed the Lord’s power in action,
his impressive works on the deepest seas.
25 He spoke, and the winds rose,
stirring up the waves.
26 Their ships were tossed to the heavens
and plunged again to the depths;
the sailors cringed in terror.
27 They reeled and staggered like drunkards
and were at their wits’ end.
28 “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
29 He calmed the storm to a whisper
and stilled the waves.
30 What a blessing was that stillness
as he brought them safely into harbor!
31 Let them praise the Lord for his great love
and for the wonderful things he has done for them.
32 Let them exalt him publicly before the congregation
and before the leaders of the nation.
33 He changes rivers into deserts,
and springs of water into dry, thirsty land.
34 He turns the fruitful land into salty wastelands,
because of the wickedness of those who live there.
35 But he also turns deserts into pools of water,
the dry land into springs of water.
36 He brings the hungry to settle there
and to build their cities.
37 They sow their fields, plant their vineyards,
and harvest their bumper crops.
38 How he blesses them!
They raise large families there,
and their herds of livestock increase.
39 When they decrease in number and become impoverished
through oppression, trouble, and sorrow,
40 the Lord pours contempt on their princes,
causing them to wander in trackless wastelands.
41 But he rescues the poor from trouble
and increases their families like flocks of sheep.
42 The godly will see these things and be glad,
while the wicked are struck silent.
43 Those who are wise will take all this to heart;
they will see in our history the faithful love of the Lord.
Oh how beautiful our Earth is.
rhaps it’s because I read that it’s National Dear Diary Day. I remember my first diary. My grandmother gave it to me when I was eight or nine years old. I don’t recall if it was for any particular reason, but I do remember her telling me that I may like to keep a diary, just to have a place to write down whatever was happening in my life. My first diary was orange and it had a lock and tiny key to keep others from being able to read what I wrote inside it. I didn’t write in it every day, but I did write in it occasionally. It was usually when I had some kind of confession to make, like whatever boy I secretly held hands with or was crushing on. I used various writing utensils to scribble these confessions, including crayon. After my orange diary was exhausted from the bad scribbling and elementary aged confessions, my grandmother bought me another diary. This one was bright blue with a girl holding a bouquet of flowers, embossed on the cover. This diary helped me talk about those things that were bothering me. My parents had just divorced; I started a new school, and I was having all those preteen emotions that accompany that age.
rascallythoughts 